\tAs of June 25th of this year, my wife and I have been married for twenty-nine years. After that length of time together, you\u2019d not think there would be many surprises left in our relationship. We should know one another about as thoroughly as any two people might. But even so, to my surprise, last year we discovered that I had a secret. A dark secret that no one knew or suspected about me.<\/p>\n
\tA secret named Kinney.<\/p>\n
\tEvery evening, before we go to bed, my wife and I take our dog for a walk around the block. We live in a quiet and peaceful neighborhood and we enjoy the time together after our children are tucked away in their beds..<\/p>\n
\tI was sitting in my office putting on my shoes while my wife was chatting with me and the dog was bouncing up and down in anticipation of his nightly stroll. Suddenly my wife\u2019s eyes went round and she asked: \u201cdo you usually use a shoehorn to put on your shoes?\u201d<\/p>\n
\tI looked at the shoehorn in my hand, looked at her, and commented, \u201cWell, yeah.\u201d<\/p>\n
\t\u201cI never knew you used a shoehorn.\u201d<\/p>\n
\tI let it dangle from one finger. \u201cI keep it right there all the time.\u201d I pointed at a shelf next to my desk.<\/p>\n
\t\u201cYes, I\u2019ve seen it there.\u201d<\/p>\n
\t\u201cIt\u2019s from Kinney Shoes. I think I got it when I was a teenager. Maybe even before that. I\u2019ve been using it every day of my life for\u2014\u201d I thought quickly \u201cWell\u2026for over forty years now.\u201d I paused. \u201cLonger than I\u2019ve known you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\tMy wife gaped at me, as if I\u2019d suddenly grown an extra arm.<\/p>\n
\tMy shoehorn is a simple object, made of thin steel, about four inches long, and stamped with the words \u201cKinney Shoes The Great American Shoe Store.\u201d It is still shiny and smooth, even though I\u2019ve used it daily for most of my life. Kinney Shoes used to stick them in the shoebox whenever you bought shoes from them, as I recall. It was both an advertising gimmick as well as good customer service.<\/p>\n
\tMy wife was flabbergasted to learn that I had carefully carried the shoehorn with me when I left home at 18 to come to college, and then had moved with it after college, through apartments and two houses before we took up residence in our current home. I suppose it\u2019s somewhat remarkable that I could keep track of such a minor and small item for so long. But then, it\u2019s something that I use every day, sometimes more than once a day (since I take my shoes off whenever I get home and only put them on when I have to go somewhere). Apparently I\u2019m somewhat fond of the simple little device.<\/p>\n
\tMy wife does not use a shoehorn and in fact never has. I pointed out that if you wear men\u2019s dress shoes a shoehorn is nearly a necessity; otherwise the back end of the shoe will tend to get crushed down and ruined from putting it on. A shoehorn makes it much easier to get one\u2019s heels into a tight pair of dress shoes. Of course I don\u2019t wear dress shoes very often anymore; mostly it\u2019s just tennis shoes or sandals. But I\u2019d feel funny putting on shoes without using a shoehorn now. It\u2019s become an established habit. And I\u2019m quite the creature of habit.<\/p>\n
\tMy wife remains puzzled as to how she could have missed the fact that I use a shoehorn, especially since she\u2019d seen it on the shelf. She said she\u2019d just never put it together in her head.<\/p>\n
\tThe Kinney Shoe store chain no longer exists. The G.R. Kinney Company was an American manufacturer and retailer of shoes. George R. Kinney had founded the company in 1894. By 1929 there were 362 stores across the country. In 1963 the company was sold to the F.W. Woolworth chain and remained a wholly owned subsidiary of that corporation. The Foot Locker division was begun in 1974 and as the Kinney Store brand declined in popularity, eventually the remaining stores\u2014about 400 by then\u2014were all shuttered in 1998. Foot Locker remains in business and the Woolworth Company changed its name to the Venator Group, Inc. and has since closed all their Woolworth stores, too.<\/p>\n
\tShoehorns have probably been around nearly as long as shoes have been. They were originally made from animal hoofs; most of the ones you\u2019ll find today will be made of plastic. The metal ones, like the one I use, are not so common anymore.<\/p>\n
\tJerry Seinfeld, the comedian, reportedly collects shoehorns. As did the author, Mark Twain: he owned more more than 3000 of them. I have no particular interest in shoehorns myself, really. I\u2019m perfectly happy using the same one I\u2019ve always used. It works, and that\u2019s all I really care about.<\/p>\n
\tAnd my wife is slowly coming to grips with my, till now, deep dark secret.<\/p>\n
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